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Bickering kids, school, hair and ovaries.

The updates-

Adjusting to now having not one, not two, but all three of my boys back under one roof has been interesting. The eldest, who is 18 is currently back at their father’s packing things up to move in full time. I was pretty shocked (Happily) when they told me the plan- but, I’m also glad. Though I know that was daunting- everything out in the open must feel a bit more of a relief. I do, however, keep thinking, Holy shit, what if we wind up in the same classes and my kid makes a dumbass of me?


I’d be pleased as punch and not even remotely surprised.


That said, they’ll be attending classes “on the ground” before I will, so, who knows. I was previously accepted to SLU but have to reapply. I haven’t decided if I want to go that route or not, just yet. The past year has just been “Oh my gawd, make up for that massive fuck up.” so, that’s where I’ve been. I’m just glad they can avoid the mistakes I made- granted, it’s not like I really have to advise much there.

That said: the bickering around my house is insane. Just insane.

You’d think that age difference would matter- I mean, 5, 12, and 18. No, no, it does not. For now, due to the insanely hot summer: the 12 year old and 18 year old share a room. (We have an attic bedroom but it is hot as freaking balls up there.) I have already noted: I kinda gotta put the kibosh on the eldest exploiting this, because they tend to wanna game constantly on said 12 year old’s big screen. 5 and 18 are far from passive, but 12 is. Very. Since 18’s not been here a couple days: I’ve noticed 12 doing his chores up quickly so he gets his screen time and less bickering between 12 and 5 as a result.

Stack Update-

First off, two additions cured my partner and I’s goddamn gum disease. Not even shitting you. It’s brilliant. I will get to that in a second.

I was having a conversation about hair growth in the right places and reduction of it in the wrong places so I wanted to update this with a sorta shopping list o’ hair growth awesome. Because, all things considered, that…oh, I got that one down pat. Someone else asked for the stack regimen that helps uterine health during clomid cycles, etc- okay, got that, too and a new reader with endo was asking some questions, I hope I can answer those effectively for you.

Like I said, EVERYONE got pregnant…but me. In fairness, though, documenting the hormonal- it might have been stress induced. As in, not me.

Granted, we did, in fact, give the fertile window a real hulk smash…without confirmation of ovulation by temping (Which is not possible for me.) we have no way of knowing if my body was like LH SURGE…oh wait, let’s do this later on… and we missed it. I suspect that’s what happened.

Since I started quitting smoking, I take my modafinil here and there, but not very often. I simply haven’t read enough data to make me feel like it won’t hinder fertility. It has a histamine action, I know. Pardon my geek witchery here but: estrogen is an asshole to me. I get a surge and I go from ol Freya lay ‘em to slay ‘em in about 10 seconds and back again. Plus, gnarly brain fog, bloating to the point I look pregnant (Yeah, thanks, fucking asshole body. My 2 week wait is ALWAYS Pregnancy-Sign-Rife but no, no. It’s a tangle of estrogen, progesterone and…let me get to the other thing here in a sec.) Unfortunately when those things jump…others do in response, moreso than most female bodied types- and the above concern becomes: sort of blended with: and

But, my darlin’ is completely aware of…

In short, I become this angry weeping jackass of epic proportions, with acne, bloating, facial hair growing like goddamn gangbusters and farting like a warthog with IBS. It ain’t pretty. That is in no way commentary on my partner’s behavior- nothing justifies the beast going beastly. Except…a few weeks ago there was a rather, er, explosive fight wherein things were said. He broke it, he’s helping fix it- but said thing, in particular put one hellacious brain weasel in there that gnaws. HARD. This still doesn’t make him responsible for when I go shitty, mind: it’s just what’s up. I also tend to rearrange furniture because, hey, I can. Stress hormone jumps aren’t entirely horrid, if you can do that and burn them the fuck into the ground by way of using them. If you however, suspect you are pregnant…you cannot. While I can in fact do more while knocked up than your typical sedentary type: wah wah wah.

Oh and insomnia. I don’t sleep much by way of just being me- but, suckage. I fucking loathe clomid, in particular. In any case, the moment the insomnia begins, Kurt takes it kinda like:

‘Cause the beast, it is rising. Aggressive bullshit may ensue. Or, frustrated weeping, “No no, you didn’t do anything, fucking ASPCA ads…” or, he comes home to a totally different layout in the house.

My stack did eliminate a lot of the bullshit- and anecdotally in those friends it did the trick for, it also…worked. Shoemaker, no shoes. Balls. Anyway. My hair went from thinning and kinda eh, to a serious lion’s mane. Part of this is keeping on top of my pernicious anemia- I had an uphill battle to begin with.

Have you tried Inositol?!

Mother fucking shit turned me into a giant collection of bruising, fatigue, my goddamn hair starts thinning again and oh, oh, THIS time I got a bunch of mouth sores. If you have anemia, I would highly advise you steer clear of anything which inhibits iron, particularly if you are working on growing your hair. ‘Cause that shit’s shit. With pernicious anemia, b vitamin issues are a thang. B12, in particular as I have crap for intrinsic factor. I may write more on that later. However: if you have trouble with hair growth or sudden loss, it’s always important to look into underlying potential factors. ‘Cause oh you may not think it be like that, but sometimes, it be.

So, various forms of inositol:

I have the same problem with adding any choline impacting stuff: except it doesn’t turn me into a blood starved vampire- more like a fuzzy headed, incredibly annoyed chihuahua on meth. You could glance my way and I’d be ready to throw down. It ain’t good. Everything annoys me when I do anything that makes choline go up. Don’t ask, I do not know. (Ok, that’s not totally true, I got my damn gene shit. I know. I just…don’t have enough concrete data to say for sure.)

Anyway, fucking interplay of estrogen and histamine weird. As in, estrogen hollers at the mast cells- “HEY YOU GUUUUUYS, AMP THAT SHIT UP, right?!” at the same time, there is a reduction in the DAO enzyme. Here we go wonky, here we go. As the estrogen serves to histamine, histamine returns estrogen like fucking Mecha Serena Williams. LH is supposed to be working all of this to pop eggs out. Thankee Easta bunny, bock bock.


LH = more estrogen.


More estrogen = more histamine.

Simplest thing: antihistamines. Except, that shit will dry your cooch up faster than the damn Sahara- which does you no damn good when you’re trying to conceive. It may sound groovy and like histamine makes ovulation- which, yes, it does, except: this is such bullshit. Especially if you are like the gal who requested I rant on this and have endometriosis.

Histamine does induce ovulation but the eggs are utter crap. Immature eggs get released and they do not get fertilized. You could drop them in a vat of man mayo and the likelihood of this happening is nil. So, you will wind up with both a positive OPK for an LH surge- AND probable temperature shifts indicating ovulation: but your eggs are shit. If you do not have endo, you wind up with some shit symptoms- if you have it: it hurts like a goddamn bastard.

As I mentioned before, I am by far and away not in any way anti-science but often: feeling you have some kind of options or even control helps reduce your stress levels, which is so goddamn important. But also? If it’s anecdotal, I’m gonna say so. If I got papers, I will say so, too. And I don’t fuckin’ cite shit that ain’t shit. That stuff about histamine induced ovulation? Rabbits. So, take that for what it’s worth but in my case: I am careful about histamines and androgens as a general rule. So, let’s get to that basic stack. Many of these are great for hair growth and, after this I will get to the ones I have had success in slowing the growth of my damn catfish whiskers and goat-legs/ass hair. 


Foundation Forward, baby…

First off, you gotta know: I drink more water than I think is humanly possible. I piss like a race horse. I got a 28 oz Joyshaker bottle thingie I carry with me literally everywhere. I hate water, so I have sugar free flavor thingies.

Also: though my partner’s sleep hygiene utter shit, I keep mine as dark, silent, and cold as humanly possible and get the max amount of sleep I need, no more no less. Yours will probably be different from mine. THOSE TWO THINGS ARE FUCKING IMPORTANT. It doesn’t matter what you are addressing- drink water and sleep. You don’t do that, you won’t be screwed blue and tattooed or anything but you’ll have a much harder time.

From about September to April, I add 2000 IUs vitamin d with lunch. Full stomach=better absorption/bioavailability so, do that. If you’re like me and out in the sun WITHOUT sunscreen a lot: you are wasting your cash on Vitamin D supplements. If you’re not a sun worshipper- or you’re below the equator right now: add this to your regimen. You’ll thank me. If you are pale like I am- 10 minutes in a tank top and shorts, no sunscreen right around noon. (Sunscreen inhibits absorption by about 95%) If you don’t cause a glare when you pull off your shirt- or you are elderly, you may need more but the thing is: that ten minutes is enough for the body to create about 10,000 IUs anyhow.

Those things and my multivitamin are baseline staples. They’re my foundation and should be yours, too. Okay, maybe. 

I am going to let you in on a little secret. The number one thing I did to feel better, more motivated, more energetic, less stressed and stablize my moods. Ya’ll ready for this?

I eliminated every possible interaction with the toxic assholes in my life. If I absolutely HAVE to, it’s very very limited.


I also found out very quickly just how much toxic, unhealthy bullshit has been totally normalized and accepted, even expected socially and…yeah. No. While making friends has not been easy as a result- I am so not sorry about this. Society and all its stupid bullshit can eat my whole asshole. Actually, no, no it cannot, I would rather not be that intimate with it. You get the idea.

Ditch the fucking assholes. Do it now. Why waste your time with people who drag your ass down? What the hell is the point, there?

Here’s the Vitamin Thing-

AM Stack, empty stomach:

Tropical Oasis Mega Plus Liquid Multi-vitamin- 2 tablespoons

Note: whenever you’ve got a supplement like this and there are ingredients listed without a DV%, the odds of that being a therapeutic or even significant dose are pretty slim. Still, be careful with multi-mixes. I use this one because I absorb it REALLY well. If you wanna test the effectiveness of your multi- on a few weeks, off and go to baseline. You’ll know.

200 mcg selenium

1000 mg- L- tyrosine

1450 mg Reversatol (This is one of the things that I added which led to no more nasty ass gums. Yay.)

100 mg COQ10, with added black pepper extract (The other one I added. Seriously, two weeks in, my partner and I both started going “Wait, wait, it doesn’t look like a boxing match in toothpaste in the sink.” and it just got better after.)

500 mg Vitamin C

Pre-lunch, by about an hour:

800 mcg folate not folic acid

1000 mg N-Acetyl Cysteine- this stuff smells like the aftermath of anal sex with a demon. Just warning you- smells like a sulphur fart. 

1000 mg arginine

At some juncture in between lunch and dinner, I will eat a damn baby aspirin. I am not impressed with the data on this one, but I figure, can’t hurt too much. My partner does them anyway for preventative purposes. His stacks are a bit different from mine, for different reasons involving hormonal bullshit and sleep crap, plus not contending with a busted ass gut that can’t process freaking B12.

PM Stack- 1 hour before bed

1000 mg taurine

51 mg zinc orotate


A note about fucking melatonin

If you’re taking it- you are probably taking too much.  Additionally, if you’ve got Vitamin D problems- you probably feel kinda shitty and groggy in the morning. Cycles, baby, cycles. First off, optimal dose is actually right around .3 mgs. The only time I go above that, I never go above 1mg and that’s during the follicular phase only. Rationale on the follicular phase increase being one study I read one time about it being beneficial against placebo for LH/FSH. Also, melatonin even in very small doses is one we both cycle- because it really is not necessary to do more than 3 days on for us.

We also cycle L-Theanine at bedtime but I cycle more than he does. When I take it, it’s usually 3 days on, and about a heroic dose: (Well, for me anyway.) 400mgs usually in that 1 hour pre-bed stack. I go past 3 days and get grogmonster issues I hate. BUT oh man, that combination is so physically relaxing. Not the weird shit probable placebo high you hear people speak of: I just feel less tense. It’s nice and I sleep pretty heavily.

Kurt, on the other hand, takes an Ashwagandha blend, it has ashwagandha root, suntheanine, magnolia bark, epimedium and soy in it for weeks and loves this. I originally bought it for me, it did…fucked up shit with my blood sugar, I was like “NOPE.” He, however, enjoys great results from it in terms of his sleep being more restorative, he says. He will usually take it for a few weeks, go off a week, back on. (Bearing in mind this is not his entire regimen)

I also take a hair skin and nails formula RIGHT before bed. You probably don’t need to do this, I do it purely because the shit violates my stomach and it’s really easier this way to prevent inhibition by other supplements. I use Nature’s Bounty Hair Skin and Nails- because the doses are fairly balanced to my needs. Occasionally when my shit goes out of whack I get B12 shots but generally speaking I cannot afford the doctors’ visits, so: I also eat a tremendous amount of red meat, salmon and other fishes, plus I drink lots of orange juice.

One of the things worth mentioning is that I do not break my supplements up like this because I dislike taking a shitload of pills at once. I mean, I don’t, but the thing is: some work better with others- and some shit all over others- and others still yet simply cancel eachother out. This holds particularly true of amino acids.

Hope that helps!

A Final Note About Kicking Androgens’ Asses


I can tell when my androgens are going bugshit. I suspect the tyrosine’s impact on my stress hormones probably helps a lot but there are other things that you can do to beat the snot out of these assholes.


Anti-androgens tend to be what they call sex hormone antagonists. The thing is, shit like dyhydrotestosterone and testosterone are decidedly not fucking wonderful for some of us. Some of you fellas dig it and I cannot gripe- my partner is one of you who finds himself needing to amp them up from time to time. I get it. Except, the shit is bad news bears for me and lots of others. The thing is, you fuck with one thing, you fuck with another- and often, you do not realize you are. For instance and the weight lifters can readily attest: clomid. Dudes take clomid, clomid sets things they want in motion. But if you notice those things are in motion but you do not want them to be- and you want the other result: putting the kibosh on that shit is what to do. This is already long as shit- if you want the rationale, ask in the comments. Black cohosh is amazing for this but I am not doing that one in a catch-all: it’s one of those you don’t wanna fuck with unless you are REALLY informed and deserves its own post.


5 cups of green tea a day will help a little- plus, it’s got that theanine in it, which is mildly relaxing.


5 gs Reishi mushroom


200 mgs vitex per day- NOTE: you cannot take vitex with certain fertility meds, so ask your freaking doctor about this.


Saw palmetto- here’s another one you need to be kinda careful with. Fuck up your dose and you’ll fuck up your estrogen levels: so you might wanna ask your doctor before you do this. However, usually about 160mgs daily is beneficial in inhibition of dude hormones.


You can also add flax and soy to your diet- I do not, because my problems with estrogen going bananas. If I am nursing an infant, though: oh you betcha I do flax. I also do fenugreek. This not only improves my breastmilk production but I smell like maple syrup and I dig that. If you’re looking for THAT THING TO MAKE BOOBS: I can say, anecdotally, that the women I have told about using fenugreek/flax for breastmilk production who were not trying to have breastmilk but trying to have breasts claim it helps. I cannot attest to that, scientifically but anecdotally: it apparently helped along with HRT in one case and without it in the other.


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