EDIT: I was seriously humbled when I got hit up about doing readings based on this and yes, I do have them, I just…didn’t have them set up yet because I thought I’d be all marketing smart and build up. Woopsies. Never was very good at suspense. Anyway- by humbled, I mean, I started bawling like crazy and felt completely overwhelmed because I really didn’t think anybody’d like what I had to say and yet: you did. And that was probably one of the coolest things to happen in a long time at a time I needed it most. Anyhoo, yes, you can order these, and you can do so here: http://store.badasstrology.com/products/the-chiron-report
So, I promised myself- and someone else that I would, at least once a day write something strictly because.
Because why, well, that’s neither here nor there. This is going to be about Chiron- and, well, you got a little introduction to this in So, I Did The Chart of a Real Centaur but, I wonder, as I begin: do I have enough whiskey for this?
I’m not sure. I am, however, a bit sick and feverish today: so, this could get fun. I want to first explore the myth behind this aspect: and with good reason. Pain and healing are very complicated and, well, everything represented IN the telling- has to do with the composite life experiences that provide both. Let me explain to you why I feel like I do:
If you take all of the Chiron bits in my own chart and you slap them together- with nothing else, you get a Morrissey song, set to a Slayer riff.
No shit, you honestly do: and somebody NEEDS to get on that mashup.
My love life, for those who keep asking: is an absolute dumpster fire. Rather frankly, it always has been and as I inch closer and closer to figuring out just what karmic pattern I’m dealing with: it gets better.
And it gets bitter, too.
Not as bitter as it could be, mind you- I didn’t write all that hopeful, shiny stuff about my PTSD and anxiety, the work I did there- for no reason. If you’d like a more comprehensive backstory: it’s out there. I’ve told it plenty of times for various activist events. I’m not ashamed, I’m just at a point in my life where I’m tired of that story and ready for the happier ones. My current one is not without tons of joy: but, Chiron/Taurus/7th and that bloody North Node Virgo tell the story better than I can. Or want to, really.
Believe me, given that yes, I am now beyond child bearing (At least, mostly: I know it’s possible, it’s just unlikely) and not particularly concerned with happily ever after as it pertains to romantic partners. Where am I at with it?
Well, since I mentioned it:
If my tongue gets any further into my cheek, I’ll be licking my own earlobe.
I’m not without hope, but I am also not particularly concerned at this juncture.
Let’s get to Chiron, though.
Chiron Begins: Horsin’ Around
Looking at Greek mythology, Chiron was an interesting character- pretty much THE Centaur. Like, you want to get the most Sagittarius Sagittarius in the history of everything and blend it with the martyr nature of a Virgo: you got Chiron. He was a teacher and a mentor- but how he came into that position just sucked and it really didn’t get better. I love to think about the symbolism of it all- because his father was Cronus and his mother was Philyra.
So, you’ve got: wounded teacher- I won’t spoiler it in case you don’t know
Who comes from: essentially Time (His father)
Who came from Sky (Uranus) and Earth (Gaia): and we could go into that little tale of testicular woe later, but for now, it’s really not important to this story.
And Healing (His mother) who was also, oddly, goddess of paper and perfume.
Who came from the Sea (Oceanus) and
But, we have a symbolic tale of wisdom coming from time, connection with the universe and healing.
At least, this is how I look at it, except, it gets worse. Because in order to have the ultimate of that wisdom- you have to give yourself back to time and back to the earth, then ultimately, the sky.
Why Chiron Was The Weirdo Among The Weirdos
First, you should probably understand the nuts and bolts of centaurs. They were the wild men. Half horse-half man, which, you probably know. They really are the prototype immature Sagittarius- freedom loving carousers with a serious penchant for getting stupid drunk and being very violent. Kind of like the satyrs, but a real buzzkill with that fighting thing- talk about party fouls. Anyway- they really were these barbaric sort of wild men: and along comes Chiron with his $50 words and intelligence. Whereas the other centaurs were born of the union of the sun and the rainclouds (That’d be Ixion and Nephele by some tellings): he was born of Cronus and Philyra.
Chiron was different because technically speaking- he was an accident. Cronus really had flipped keen crazy over Philyra, but he was married. Hey, man, nymph’s gonna nymph- you can’t hate her for it. Particularly as she was not really that interested in him. He wanted to pursue her- but, man, his sister/wife Rhea- not someone you wanted to piss off. THE Magna Mater. Mother of all Gods and Goddesses. She would give birth and he’d eat her babies right up until she got to Zeus. Then she was like, “LOOK, you asshole- you’re not eating this one.”
Clearly, she did not foresee the toddler years, but, I digress. This is another story entirely- but, suffice it to say, you really didn’t want to screw around on a God or a Goddess: but, they seemed to do that a lot. In this case, to try to evade detection, Cronus transforms himself into this beautiful stallion- yes, here is where it gets decidedly weird: if your method of seduction is to become a horse: you’re not going to get very far.
Unless of course, the intended partner is a horse, in which case, Loki, dammit. Wrong pantheon. Back to the Greeks and how Chiron happened.
So, Cronus is hot to trot for a nymph, quite literally except- she’s REALLY not interested now and turns into a mare to run away from him: but…woopsies, it happens anyway. (No one’s actually sure if it was rape or not, ultimately.) He took what he wanted and they got caught in the act: and, eventually, Chiron was born. But Philyra was horrified at her child, because he’s not homid and he’s not horse, he is both sooo- she begs Zeus to turn her into anything, just anything else so she would not have to bear the shame. So, he’s like, “Fine. You’re a tree. Leave.” *rimshot*
Long story short, he ends up on Mount Pelion where he lives and gets married to a nymph- Chariclo and she has daughters for him- who, of course, all go on to their own stories, and one boy, Carystus.
He was said to be a healer right from the get- but also, an oracle, an astrologer, a teacher and he taught the heros. A lot of heroes. So much so, that he develops a sort of bond with the god Dionysus. He learns quite a bit from him about rituals and other things. One of these heroes was Peleus- who was kind of an idiot. He happens upon him in the woods, after he’s really pissed off Acastus- or, at least, Acastus’s wife. She really wanted in the would be hero’s pants, he was not so keen on the whole thing, so he rejects her- and she accuses him of rape. So, Acastus takes Paleus out hunting: except, he ganks his sword and strands him. Chiron jumps in, gets the sword back and saves his ass.
Heros and Other Bullshit
So, here’s where we get into the guts of it: Chiron gets hurt, a lot. Welcome to the oracular life, this is, I am pretty sure a side effect of being prophetic. That’s not in the lore, it’s just me speculating somewhat bitterly.
Heroes just suck. Let’s be real clear, they do. Heroes are a pain in the ass to deal with because their egos and their junk often get the better of them. Well, Chiron gets hurt again- because that’s what he does. There’s a Prometheus thing- of course, because there is always a Prometheus thing- and we will get to that in a second. First, heroes- one especially: Hercules.
Let’s be clear, whereas heroes tend to be assholes, Hercules was their king, crowned with a glittering rectum with ruby hemorrhoids.
You’ve probably seen the movie- but, not entirely accurate…it’s Disney, though. C’mon.
We all got a Disney Princess we dig. I’m sure you can figure this one out. 😉
Anyway- Chiron trains Hercules to complete the 12 labours, essentially. They kind of hang out here and there and one day, Hercules is working on the 4th when Hercules asks another centaur, Pholus for some wine- they’re having dinner, enjoying themselves and I imagine at this point- Pholus winks and says, “Y’know, I have this amazing wine- given to me by the God of Wine, himself. It’s delicious and, let’s uncork it.” So, he does, but, the other centaurs smell it the moment the cork goes pop- and come running, violent as ever, wanting to steal it. Hercules busts out the Hydra-venom soaked poison arrows and he starts shooting- takes out most of them. But, as I mentioned, he’s not really that bright and ends up hitting Chiron. Chiron, being immortal- will not die, but instead, live in agonizing pain for the rest of his immortal life- meaning: forever.
Saving Prometheus’s Ass, Women Release Evil On The Planet
Here’s where Prometheus comes in. Prometheus had stolen the fire of the Gods to give it to man and well, it pissed the Gods off. He had a habit of doing this because he actually loved humanity- even though he was a titan, himself. By most accounts, he’s the one that created people, anyway- and he did quite a lot to benefit mankind: variations depend on which author you’re reading. The big one, however, was that theft of fire- but it began with sacrifice. Initially, the humans were supposed to give the very best to the Gods, and essentially, they got to eat the tablescraps. If you were mortal- you were less than, so why would you get good stuff? Well, Prometheus did not agree and he tricks Zeus into believing the lesser offering was the better one, thus setting the precedent that humans, not Gods would get the meat that actually benefitted them. So, this pissed him off and he hid the fire so they couldn’t cook it. Well, Prometheus, ever the trickster says, “Fine, asshole.” and steals it back.
You know what Zeus did to punish humanity after that? Gave them women. Basically. He sends Pandora, the first woman to earth- with the caveat that sure, men could enjoy them, fully: but only if they could manifest wealth to support them. I am not sure what that was about, honestly- but it seems like a pretty good deal to me. It wasn’t so much womankind that was the punishment- but rather what she brought with her. A jar full of chaos, destruction, and death. Yeah, I’m thinking the poets really weren’t keen on women at this time. I could get into all of that- and at some point, I might: but for now, we are talking about Prometheus’s connection to Chiron. And rambling mightily, but I love doing this. Blending varying stories to kinda paint the bigger picture here. The Greeks did it quite a bit and trust me when I say the timelines and genealogies get…very freaking weird.
When mankind really liked womankind, I’m pretty sure that irked Zeus even more, so: Prometheus got in some serious trouble. As in, chained up to a rock on a mountain and eternally having his liver eaten and regenerated and eaten again by an eagle. Hercules eventually kills the eagle- but Chiron’s the one who actually does the deed of freeing Prometheus. Chiron didn’t want to live forever in pain- one of the reasons that he was so wise, was that pain, in the first place: and having it amplified was way too much for him. Consider just a minute, the connection between pain and prophecy: and what he may have faced. Beyond physical pain and torment forever- the more pain you are in, the more you see. Again, that’s just my take.
But there is a lot of wisdom to be found in pain- that is undeniable. In the journey to seek to heal those wounds we have: we learn so much more than how to heal them, if we ever learn that.
So, how do we heal them?
How did Chiron?
Back to that dinner party gone horribly awry. Chiron goes on to continue to learn things, continue to teach things, continue to practice medicine: all while enduring unbearable agony. Eventually, he goes back to Hercules- and the hero is like, “You know, I got this friend…”
“See, he gets his liver eaten and it regrows- and the only way he can get out of this, is if somebody runs down to the underworld and gives up his own immortality. Seems like a win/win to me, man.” And Chiron agrees.
Even Zeus thinks that this is crazy, because he really does not like Prometheus- and here’s Chiron, the healer with the raw deal since birth, getting the raw deal yet again: and so, he throws him up into the sky where he becomes Sagittarius.
Side note: this story is the reason I am a frequent user of the phrase “plastic shaman”. This is not a happy, joyful path. It can contain a lot of it: but it is definitely the path of undying pain, journeying, and wisdom- and it’s not easy. That, is not my point in all of this: but if you can read the story of Chiron and not have it resonate totally- that the only way you end the pain in in self sacrifice, after a hardcore learning-healing-teaching journey: perhaps that’s not something you ought to call yourself.
Chiron in Astrology, Introduction
In astrology, Chiron’s a comet that has a freakishly weird orbit. In your chart, it’s going to represent the worst wounds you’ve got- some believe they’re karmic leftovers from past lives AND this one, and if you’re looking into how to tinker with your pain: here you go.
Interestingly- this is going to be also where you find your deepest gifts, the way you can heal others- because of your own pain. You might look at the placement and recognize the extremes you go to as a result of it. If you feel like shit about yourself, if you feel like you can’t do it, and here’s the benefit: as you dig that deep, as you face that wound, as you learn to heal on your own- you might never. But you will learn a hell of a lot about balance and how to help others heal. If you’re martyring the shit out of yourself- dollars to donuts, you can look at your Chiron placement and aspects to figure out exactly why and what needs working on.
I can tell you that the incredibly talented Michelle Young took one look at my chart and she knew my history with domestic violence and rape down to the freakish physical manifestation that I still often experience to this day. I mention it is freakish, because frankly, it is. It’s not exactly some vague sort of “Oh, you have PTSD.” thing that is obvious and I won’t mention it here: but suffice it to say, Chiron’s got a hell of alot to tell you if you listen.
Chiron will show you where your repeating issues are- and usually why they’re there so that you can go on to work them out. Like everything else in astrology, Chiron’s a bit of a double edged sword- except, you know, one side is good, the other hurts like a bitch. Maybe more like a scimitar. I have mentioned repeatedly- and no matter how bitter I sound here: this is my process. I get bitter, angry, hurt, and I feel all the way through until it’s out. Chiron never had that chance- to purge the poison, until he sacrificed himself: and similarly, this is what we do. As we heal, we tell our stories- and others can learn, feel support or at least not feel like such a damn freak- and begin to recognize it is possible to heal as well.
It can also be a sort of shoemaker with no shoes scenario- except, we’re so busy giving shoes to everyone else: we don’t notice how horribly injured and disfigured our own feet are becoming in the process as we treat all over broken glass and hot coals to do it. It’s also like- well, you do have those things you would just love to do, yet, can’t quite master- however, you’re able to tell others? That’s also here- and, explains pretty well why it is I can talk anyone through any relationship issue: and yet, never maintain one of my own for any length of time without it becoming a totally hot mess.
This is already extremely long- and I am going to go further into aspect patterns and other planets, as they relate to this, as well as house positioning. However, for now, understand that when you look at the house Chiron happens to be in- that’s where the above issues tend to hang out. I can tell you this much: when you do figure out which house Chiron’s in, the lightbulbs will go on and you’ll be like “Oh my god.” at the accuracy: especially when we play connect the dots to the other planets. There are pitfalls, pain and benefits and joy revealed in all of it- but the only way to get the good stuff? Sacrifice your ego on the altar of your own healing- and look that stuff right in the eye.